10 Micro Habits of Successful Women (Over 40 Edition!)

• Success is not just about wealth or status; it involves health, fulfillment, and joy.
• Surround yourself with people who aspire for the same positive outcomes in life.
• Daily mental clarity through journaling is essential for a productive mindset.
• Every hour should have purpose; treat your time like a budget.
• Move your body and prioritize health as the foundation of all success.

You know, when I was younger, I used to think that success was defined literally by the money that was in my bank account, the person that I was married to, the kind of car that I was driving, the career that I had, what my kids were doing, the vacations I was taking, all of the things that be worthy for a masterful Pinterest account.

But over time, as I’ve got older, I have evolved, and I've learned that happiness and success really are sitting into three main buckets: my health, my fulfillment, and my joy.

And so today we are going to talk about 10 micro habits of successful women. And before we even get started, I'm going to share with you a stat that may shock you. The median age for women, according to MIT, at their most successful, is actually 45 years of age.

Now that doesn't totally shock me, and we'll talk about that later. But no matter where you are in the continuum of life as a woman, these micro habits could work for you.

The first micro habit is stop listening to people who don't have what you want. I cannot underscore this enough. When you are taking advice or following the lead of people that don't have anything towards the direction of what you want in life, you really ought to stop and pause.

Ask yourself, "What is it? And why are you following them now?" If you are looking around to see what they're doing incorrectly, that's one thing. But following their advice and getting behind people that don't have what you want—or at a minimum more—is my first micro tip.

I firmly believe in surrounding myself by people that want the same things out of life that I want. I believe in surrounding myself around people who, quite honestly, have aspirations to strive for fulfillment, peace, and joy.

Notice I didn't say "fulfillment" in terms of "things" or "status" or "belongings"; I talked about joy, peace, and happiness. Be careful with who you're following and who your circle of inner people are because the radiation that they're putting out—you’re going to pick up on.

So I would firmly, firmly, strongly suggest that you don't get rid of all your people around you, but you shouldn't take advice from people who don't have at least what you want, if not more.

My second tip is clear your mind every day. Every day you should be doing some kind of brain dump at the end of the day to get all of the things that you're processing and filtering through out of your mind—on paper, on a cell phone, whatever it is that you need to just get it out.

Because if you don't get it out, then it's going to be floating around in your head and it's really not going to allow you to have the clarity that you need before you go to bed—the clarity that you need when you wake up.

One of the things I do is at the end of the day, I plan for the next day. I have a sticky note and I block out what my next day is going to look like. I think of all the things I have to do the next day and the things I didn't get done today, and I get those things out so that I'm not thinking in the middle of the night, "Oh, I need to do this tomorrow," or waking up in the morning like, "Oh, there was something I was supposed to do, and I can't remember."

So whatever that needs to look like, dump out your thoughts every day.

The next tip is plan your day the way that you budget—if you're budgeting correctly.

Let me clarify: Plan your day like zero-based budgeting. What that means is you have a fixed amount of time—just like in a budget, you have a fixed amount of money. Each and every hour of the day should have a purpose.

You may not have anything to do in that time; say between 5:00 and 6:00 in the evening you don't have any place to be. But that time should be for relaxing. That time should be dedicated to reading, doing laundry, etc. Map out what you're going to do each hour of the day, which is essentially called time blocking.

Taking ownership of your time—even if it doesn't always work out—means that you seize and control your day from the very beginning. Successful women definitely have ownership over their calendar and their planners, and time blocking is an essential, critical element if you want to control your day.

The next tip is to find something to look forward to every week. I didn't say find something grandiose to look forward to every week; though you may have weeks like that. I’m going out of town with my husband this weekend, and that’s something I’m looking forward to.

But find something that you can do. On Saturdays, after I work out and take care of my errands, I usually go off by myself to Trader Joe's and Target. It’s the same routine most weeks, but when I tell you I look forward to that alone time, there’s an excellent chance I’m going to wander around Target or Ulta to find something small to buy.

It’s just something to look forward to. I know I’m going to have that quiet time, that alone time, and I know I'm going to buy something for myself. So find something to look forward to—whether it is going to church, the park, reading a book, or shopping. You don’t need to go broke to have something to look forward to.

Maybe it’s enjoying a coffee at your favorite restaurant, or going out to dinner. Whatever it is, it has to be special and unique to you.

One other thing I like to do is my skincare regimen on Sunday nights, and I always look forward to doing that to start the week.

This next one is easier said than done, but the premise is pretty good. Smell good, look good, feel good. So if you can do two of those three things most of the time, you are in a good place.

If you're in between hair appointments and you know you're not looking your best, girl, smell as good as possible. Lather on that perfume, that lotion, that cream, that body oil—whatever it is that makes you smell heavenly.

If you can't look 100% but you are looking good and smelling good, I guarantee you will feel better than if you just look bummy, smell crummy, and don't feel good. Find a way to try to do all three, but at least do two of the three.

It’s simple to smell good—there are so many fragrances and perfumes. It can be a tropical floral day or a vanilla day; it’s up to you. The point is, that is something you can do to lift your spirits and raise your self-esteem when you look good and smell good.

Next, do not overcommit. I have totally embraced this over the last two years. Do not overcommit! I'm not committing to things I do not want to do. I will sometimes commit to things I don't want to do because I feel a sense of loyalty to someone and I'm willing to help them out.

But if I'm going to overextend myself and burn myself out, you can forget it. At this point in my life, I feel like I've earned the right to say these are the things I want to do and not want to do.

Piece of advice: even if you're not my age, learn that habit early. Learn to say no to what you don't want to do. Don’t commit to things that make you feel uncomfortable or outside your realm of expertise.

Show up prepared when it's not your thing. Certainly, don’t commit to other people's shortcomings. Yes, you can jump in and help when needed—we all do that. Successful women know how to roll up their sleeves and get involved, but they do not allow their time to be monopolized by things that really don't fulfill them.

And when you overcommit to things, especially those you're not interested in, that’s likely to happen.

One is do not apologize for being strong and ambitious. Successful women understand their strengths and weaknesses. But never apologize for being ambitious. However, if your ambition causes you to burn bridges and mistreat people, there's a deeper issue that needs to be addressed.

You are here for a purpose. You have talents and skills; do not apologize for them. Align yourself with your core character to ensure your gifts manifest in the right way.

But don't apologize for having ambition—you never do that.

On the flip side of being strong, being soft does not make you weak. I might be one of the most independent women you will ever meet; I can do a lot of things on my own.

But there are moments where I don't want to figure things out and want to let someone else take care of it. I have a husband who understands me and allows me to do that.

If you don't have that support yet, you can still be soft. Especially for women of color, there’s stigma that we must always be strong and have everything together. There are times when being soft and not carrying the load of everybody is appropriate.

Move your body and try to eat clean—this is the micro habit of successful women that often gets put on the back burner because it forces you to prioritize your well-being in a way that could be uncomfortable.

When I say move your body, I’m not saying go run a 5k. What I mean is to invest in your health because if your health isn’t where it needs to be, none of the other tips matter.

You cannot be the spouse, parent, friend, or person that you aspire to be when you're not healthy. Many women aren't in a healthy place—not because they're sick, but because of their habits.

So always remind yourself: I could move my body today; I could brush my teeth today; I get to go to the gym and lift weights. When you have the ability to prioritize your health and fitness, you should do it.

Be grateful. I know that sounds cliche, but being grateful for the little things can shift your whole perspective. Gratitude can make you go from feeling like a victim to feeling like a victor.

Recognizing what you have to be grateful for can transform your entire day and relationships. Adopt a mindset of gratitude versus obligation.

The last tip, which might be my favorite, is splurge on something you like and let it be your thing. For me, I usually splurge on healthcare and travel. My husband has a saying: it only takes a little more to go first class.

So if I can afford first class or an upgraded experience, I will. I splurge on my $peloton bike, my workout gear, and I even splurge on season tickets for the New Orleans Saints.

Find something you can splurge on without guilt. It’s essential to be financially responsible while treating yourself. Successful women live within their means, but they also channel their funds towards what brings them joy and happiness.

Splurging could also mean giving to others, so find what works for you.

So those are my 10 micro habits for being successful. These are things that have worked for me and have evolved over time.

I'm genuinely happy and fulfilled in my life right now, and I want to ensure we take the opportunity to pursue fulfillment and align with our purpose.

When you do, you have this glow about you. I feel like I'm in that season right now, and I might not always be, but for now, I just want to share that with you all, and I’ll see you in the next video.